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Hall of Shame (page 3)

Below are more stories of families unjustly separated by the "system" without representation of counsel and/or a Jury of their peers. The starting page, with an index, is here. These people have volunteered their stories so that everyone can understand the true damage being done, and also, so those who may be experiencing your own personal "nightmare" may realize -- you are not alone!  We want you to here them in their own words. We can't vouch for the accuracy of these tales and we hope you will understand the bitterness and frustration you will hear in some of these.

Name:Jackie Kovinchick Location: Broomfield, CO
Email Addr: shidoshima@aol.com

Children/Birth Date: Brieanne, June 17, 1985

Date Separated: Dec 28, 1994

My x & I were divorced in 1987. Breianne was then 1& 1/2 years of age. Her Father & I were only married for 4 horrible years. Upon our divorce I was granted temporary custody, and then again when the divorce was final I was awarded full physical custody and my x regular visitation.

Visitations were erratic at best. My x was always busy with his own personal life.Durring the early time of this he brought Brieanne ( still a little one in diapers) home late one evening. I always gave her a bath before "night-night" so she would be more relaxed & sleep better. This particular night when I undresed her I saw what appeared to be a very red square shaped rash on her diaper area. Considering that she had not had her diaper changed since I did it before she left on visitation I assumed it was due to her wet diaper, and that a bath & diaper rash oinment would have it cleared up by morning. It didn't.

Upon seeing this I called her Father at work & asked him to take her to her Doctor with me. Of course her fathers normal reaction was defnsive & aggrivated, because he assumed I was accusing him of doing "something" to Breianne.This is 1986.

In 1987 I met a wonderful man & we began seeing each other. My main concern was how Brieanne would do with this new relationship in my life. I am happy to say that to this day Brieanne & her step Father (my Husband of 12 years) share a wonderful   friendship. David & I were married in February of 1987, and were expecting a baby in 1988. David & I always made sure that at every oportunity she would see her Father and that she was a very impotant part of David & I.

June 1988, I went into premature labor again & was rushed to the hospital. I ended up staying for about 4 days again. The afternoon I was released my Husband came to get me. I was put on full restrictions. No cooking, no cleaning ect, just bed rest.  Brieanne was with her Father on visitation that day. David & I were sitting at the dinner table when my x brought Brieanne home. Keep in mind she is only 3 years old at this time. David went to the door, Brieanne was in tears & her father just drove off leaving her on the porch. When David brought her in she began to hit & cry & push away, for no apparent reason.David & just backed off to give her space & to observe. Brieanne kept repeating this odd little ryhme about "tweezers in my butt". After many hours of calming & comforting she gave us bits & pieces about her uncle ( my x's brother) touching her with tweezers, and showing us where by pointing to her privates.We called the police.

They belived what was being told to them & we were taken to the hospital for her to be examined. Upon examination by the trauma nurses , they stated that even thought there was no physical damage, they believed that something did happen to her because of her emotional state. I went into full labor.

July 1988, David & I had our baby boy. August 1988 a motion of protective orders were put into place. The uncle was not allowed to have contact with Brieanne at anytime without the presence of another adult. The very evening that I received the order I got a call from my x, he stated "I was there when my brother did that to Breianne, I saw it happen, but I am not going to hate my brother for doing that to her because blood is thicker than water." Sick.

January 1990, my x decided to move to California. He and his second wife had split up & she had taken thier Daughter Amber back to Michigan.He never called Brieanne here at my house after that & he quit paying child support. This is supported by his Aunt & Uncle that live in California. But visitaitons continued with my x's mom who lives near us . Supposedly he maintained contact with Brieanne by calling while she was with his mom.Upon the return after a visitation I saw his mom drive into my driveway with Brieanne sitting in the front seat of her car on the uncle's lap. I called his mom & told her that was a direct violation of the court order & that there wouldn't be anymore visitations. His mom petitioned for grandparent intervenor visits. Durring the hearing it was brought up that she was concealing my x's whereabouts, she belligerently said she wasn't. When she was asked then for his info she refused right in front of the judge. Yet she was granted visitations.

1991, grandparent visitations continued despite withholding of my x's whereabouts. And a new & very ugly aspect became apparent in Brieanne. When she would return from each visit she would say the ugliest & meanest things to Dave & I about us & about her handicapped brother. "My name is Gibson period, Mom what does period mean?" " Nick is stupid he isn't even my brother he is only my half brother.  You are not my mom, grandma D is more like my mom." Daddy David isnt my daddy, he is my s-t-e-p daddy." She spelled out step. I still posess written proof of my x's mom forcing Brieanne to say these things, my x's mom wrote letters to one of Brieannes therapists admitting this.

June 1992, the beginning of the worst. My x called for the first time in 18 months for Brieanne's birthday. He stated he was comming to see her. I told him that because of the situation I was uncertain & that I needed his address & proof of it & his telephone #. He refused. I filled a motion of reasonable fear, faliure to pay child support & abandonment. The magistrate ordered an evaluation surronding Brieannes difficulties with visitation.

The outcome of a $4000.00 evaluation done under force & duress, was that Brieanne needed therapy & that I was "distorted." Which was translated into I couldn't tell reality from non reality due to me dealing with to much stress, ie: the courts, the evaluators, the cost, and being the parent of a handicapped child. According to the therapist I made up the hideouse stories about what had happend to Brieanne in the past. I was ordered into therapy.

Brieannes Father & his mom picked Brieanne's therapist.She had therapy with this woman for a year. I participated, when asked to & even when not asked. But after the fact we found out that my x's mom manipulated the therapist, ( I still have tangible proof of this,)though pressures from herself & her attorney. During this time my x began living with a woman & her 3 sons and was doing well convincing all involved of there "happy" family life & that him & this woman were married. Brieanne began visitations in California with him.

1993 & 1994. There was to be a follow up evaluation in the fall of 1994. I was advised I could request a guardian adlitem & new evaluators due to the "realtionship" between the first evaluators & my x's attorney that was discoverd. When I motioned for this I was also received a motion for change of custody. This was in the summer of 1994. Brieanne was at the time in California through the summer.

August of 1994. I received a call from my x's live in. She told me that a week ago she discoverd her oldest son (14) sexually molesting Brieanne. The change of custody hearing is set for December. My x informs me that he involved social services & a therapist during this phone call from his girlfriend. I learn that he is wrong for not informing me prior to treatment. After all at this time I am still the custodial parent. Brieanne is sent home immediately. I attempted to contact her therapist, who has now let her licensce lapse & moved to California. I am advised to lay off the therapy, because it is felt ( by a professional) that she has been over therapied.

December 1994, Christmas, the hearing for custody began. A 3 day nightmare. The new evaluator which had only met with us 3 times swear I am abusing Brieann through PAS & physical neglect based upon the testimony of my x & his mom. Brieanne's 6th grade teacher who is a trained child psychologist testifies to the contrary as does her doctor who cared for her for at least 5 years. The evaluators admit they could be wrong. This falls on the deaf ears of the Judge.  The judge who is handling our case is well known to be a Father's right activist. Judge Baylin had an interview in a news paper wich exposed this.

The social sevices therapist from California testified by phone, what she said was fairly predictable. But upon listening to this testimony from California the evaluator's decide to use this. They persuaded the Judge that the only way Brieanne could have allowed this "victimazation" to happen was because of me. That I kept her from her father for 18 months & made her so desperate to see him that she would do anything.  We were then dissmissed so the judge could make her ruling. For some unknown reason Dave & I still vividly remember the fact that the evaluators always sat with my x & his mom & their attorney.

When we were called back in I was told by the jugde that Brieanne was going to live iwth her father because, I am distorted if I can create the kind of desperation in Brieanne that the evals spoke of & that I couldnt possibly be a fit mother for Brieanne with all the extra work I have with my handicapped son.

Upon hearing that my x's mom stood up and loudly announced that she still wanted visitaiton rights. Of couse that was denied. Never once was my son & daughter's relationship taken into consideration, never once durring the whole trail was any evidence provided to support the accusations of neglect & abuse from my x & his mom, or in support of the valuators.I didn't even have a jury trial. Never once was there any question as to my x dissapearing for over a year. In the state of Colorado that is abandonment. Never once did they even look at the relationship between my x, Brieanne & his mom. The judge & evaluators bought what they accused me of & said I did as fact without proof.

Never was their relationship with Brieanne seen in any other light than a "wonderfull" family.Yet my Daughter still lives with him despite the numerous women that move in & out of the apartment. Despite the fact that my x still has an anger managment problem & uses Brieanne as his target for his anger. Judge Baylin thinks he is just such a wonderful man. How am I ever going to explain this to Brieanne's little Brother, they spent six years together as siblings & even though he is mildly autisic & hearing impaired he isn't dumb. He still shows signs of emotional trauma over this. He gets totally "freaked out" everytime I go somewhere without him. It took a long time & a lot of effort on our part to make him feel safe again.He still to this day doesn't deal with Breianne leaving very well & it is so very heartbreaking for us.

Jackie Kovinchick

Name:Silan Hernandez-Nicholson Location: Sunrise, FL
Email Addr: adjanisila@aol.com

Children/Birth Date: Adjani Katarina Hernandez-Nicholson, April 1990

Date Separated: Mother's Day, 1997

Trying to "enforce Final Mandate Appeals Court."  This case was, Reversed and Remanded, due to Appeals Court findings of "gross Violations of due process and Abuse of discretion by Judge."

Currently denied Court access via ILLEGAL GAG Order by Judge that I can't file Motions or make a Plea of help as a violence victim or he will imprison me with sanctions. JUDGE REFUSES TO REMOVE HIMSELF FROM MY CASE OR RENDER RELIEF. I am in dire hardship of a new Lawyer for Affirmative action against this Judge, for parental and survival rights.

Same exact situation as Elian cuban boy, except paradox; taken illegal custody of by florida locked in with the Perpetrator a Violation of the Freedom Movement Act. zmy daughter is a US citizen, I am a  law abiding tax payor denied due process   which gravely violated my Constituional rights.

I was denied my Parental rights in Official Oppression since, Mother's Day 1997....when 9 Police with guns, handcuffs, ramsacked my home, with NO-Knock warrant.  No Miranda rights no notice to me. They iillegally and forceably abducted my 7 year old little girl Adjani who was in sheer terror and screaming for her, Mommy. "NEVER APART SINCE BIRTH" Horrified neighbors watched this screaming and grave injustice.

t is INCOMPREHENSIBLE. I held active Court Order of Protection against my husband's violence.  Since then, my child's been held 100% hostage in serious Psychological Parental Alienation by the father with an "established abuse history" with us based on Chicago & Florida Court facts, ER, 911.

Witnesses all substantiated the facts which were ignored by Broward county lower trial family Judge Lawrence Korda. For every plea of help of me for my child, the Judge retaliates "double" with Sanctions to the Petitioner wife. Made to pay $1,200 Alimony/ child support to Batterer STILL, I HAVE YET TO HEAR MY BELOVED CHILDS VOICE AND SHE MY PRECIOUS LITTLE GIRL I am anguished, for her safety & welfare as a parent.

Worldwide my airline colleauges, neighbors, family and friends have written hundreds of appeals for JUSTICE FOR ADJANI. To to the Governor, Senator, and President with an absolutely NO RESPONSE FROM THE STATE OF FLORIDA ABOUT MY CHILDS WELL BEING UP TO DATE!! I have been found guilty of NO OFFENSE. I am  law abiding with impeccable history.

The Judge makes it so impossible for every lawyer I hire to fight for my rights that they quit. All relief has been given to the Respondent abuser since day One, and I the disabled wife made to pay for his life although he earns $50,000 a year and wife total income is, $11,760 Social security disability garnished.

SELECTIVE JUSTICE? HOW CAN THE GUSTAPO COME AND BREAK INTO YOUR HOME AND ILLEGALLY ABDUCT YOUR CHILD WHILE HOLDING ORDER OF PROTECTION AGAINST VIOLENCE, in USA? ' I SUGGEST A HIDDEN AGENDA, VESTED INTEREST ON JUDGE PART WITH THIS PETITIONER'...WHY WOULD A JUDGE DO THIS TO AN INNOCENT LITTLE CHILD?

A Childs best interest is best served when the U.S.A RESPECTS A CHILDS BASIC UNIVERSAL BIRTHRIGHT, TO BE LOVED BY BOTH THEIR MOTHER AND FATHER EQUALLY"..not brutal invasion tearing families apart.

What inhuman inmoral message are these courts giving our children inflicting upon them such Cruel Child Abuse, and Applauding the Perpetrators abuse? WAIVER EMPOWERS ABUSE. Please help Stop the Violence, help Protect the Children. AS PARENT WE MUST UNITED TO BE OUR CHILDRENS VOICES THAT ARE BEING, KEPT SILENT IN OPPRESIVE VIOLENCE! WE ARE OPEN TO ANY HELPFUL FEEDBACK OR IDEAS, gracias. SEE JUSTICE FOR ADJANI WEBSITE FACTS A MOTHERS DAY worst FEAR and A CHILDS worst NIGHTMARE (help) http://expage.com/page/justice2adjani

Together We Can Stop Abuse, Mrs.Sila & Adjani Mother&Child Seeking Equal Justice, illegal Prisoners
also email: JUSTICEforADJANI@aol.com

Name:Monica Sloan Location: Palmdale, CA
Email Addr: MS5516@AOL.COM

Children/Birth Date: William(DOB) 1991
Michael (DOB) 1991

Date Separated: May, 2 1992

Yes, I will go to Court on 10/04/99 I ran awy to Canada with my twin sons William and Michael. Their father, never bothering to marry me, decided that I should have 2 hours per week with them and they were only 6 months old. He abused me when I was pregnant and he threatened me with guns. He is wealthy so guess who wins. I am a social worker for children with Los Angeles County. I have worked there for 13 years, however, I have only had monitored visits for no reason for eight years. My sons are almost as big as I am. I am paying more than guideline child support to this man who is a multimilionaire and I routinely have my utilities shut off because I can't keep up with my bills. Recently the children were told by their father that they should get me to hit someone or kiss a woman so he could deem me as unfit (i.e. a violent lesbian I suppose) The children's older brother, a child by this man's previous marriage committed suicide. His remaining son from this marriage is psychotic.

My chidren have been kicked by this son (age 30) addditionally, the children's father's girlfriend was tested out on the Rorshach/MMPI as psychotic/borderline and sociopathic. However, since money is not on my side my children are living in a situation that is abberant and unsafe while I rescue children from other families and am unable to see my children for more that 24 hours per month. THIS IS JUSTICE?

Update (12/22/99) - I have the Pepper-Slone case. I just went to Court at 111 N. Hill St. Los Angeles, CA 90016 on an OSC to change to joint custody/no monitoring (after 8 years, please) and to quit paying child support to the multi-millonaire (paying above legal child support) and to get my children to come and stay with me. They are living with more than one schizophrenic, sociopath and a controlling, non-empathic father. I am sorry to say my children are in this condition. Further more, because of my children's father's girlfriend (schizophrenic/sociopath) they are not allowed to drink milk because she has hallucinated hives and caused them gastrointestinal distress hours after drinking milk. I am praying to G-d that there will be a miracle and that my twin boys will be returned to me. I love them.

Name: Joseph Wilmot Location: Freehold, NJ
Email Addr: fiorenzos@aol.com

Children/Birth Date: Joseph (DOB) August 25, 1984
Jonathan (DOB) August 4, 1986
Veronica (DOB) March 11, 1989
Krystle (DOB) October 16, 1991

My wife and I separated November 2, 1995. Just before Christmas we had a court hearing. My wife didn't want me to have time with my children during the holidays. During the court hearing the judge decided that until a permanant property and custody agreement was reached that neither my wife nor I could remove items from the home we had shared for almost ten years. I was also allowed visitation over the holidays. My wife remained in the home with the children and I moved in with my parents who live approx 10 miles away. I saw my children almost on a daily basis for the first three months of 1996. I called my wife on the last Friday in March 1996 to let her know I would be picking the children up on Saturday morning. When I arrived at the house on Saturday morning, it was emtpy. I do mean empty. The children were not there. My wife was not there. There was not a stick of furniture or a picture on the wall. On the wall a note was taped that said "I have what I want, you can have the rest".

I had no idea where my children were. I went to their school to find out if they had been advised that the children wouldn't be in school. I was told by the school staff that my wife asked them not to divulge any information to me because she feared for their safety. I was told I'd need a court order. I went to court and the judge compelled the school to release the information. My children had been taken from New Jersey by their mother to California. The judge in charge of our divorce case issued a warrant for her arrest (which to this day has not been served). He also stopped the child support payments and issued an order which compelled her to return the children to New Jersey. The California courts made NO attempt to locate them let alone serve the warrant. During the next two years I had next to no contact with my children.

She reappeared in New Jersey in October of 1997. She made herself know to my sister, who had tried to keep contact with my children without taking sides. My wife told my sister that I was not to be told that she was back. My sister refused to go along and has not had access to my children since. (She and her husband are Godparents to our oldest son)

I notified the court that she was back in NJ although I didn't know where. She filed for child support to be reinstated. Even though there was a warrant for her arrest sworn, she was never arrested. She was ordered by the court to bring the children in for psychological testing - she refused. NOTHING WAS DONE. She was ordered to provide me with a phone number to contact my children- she agreed to in court but later reneged (I still don't have my children's phone number) - NOTHING WAS DONE. I was given visitation rights. I even agreed to have it at my parents home. She agreed in court but I saw them only once in three months. again, NOTHING WAS DONE.

During this time I had a heart attack and then a angioplasty. Because of the disability child support was cut. I returned to work in mid 1998 and child support was reinstated. Still, though I had NO contact with my children. Each time my wife disobeys a court order she is threatened with dire consequences but there is never a follow through. At this point in time, she is supposed to bring the children to the court house for visitation each Monday afternoon from 4 - 5 PM. She brought them the first week. She didn't get there until 4:15 but the end was still 5 PM. Time doesn't get added for her tardiness. The next three weeks she called the probation person handling our case and told her the children were sick and couldn't make the visitation.(that's all 4 children sick three weeks in a row) Probation isn't concerned as long as she makes the phone call. I am at my wits end. It has been almost 4 years since I have had any meaningful contact with my children and I would be grateful for any advice I can receive. I have reems of paper that say I am in the right as far as the court sees, but NO relationship with my kids.

Name: Jerry Evans Location: Norman, Oklahoma
Email Addr: thesaint@icnet.net

Children/Birth Date: Rebecca Evans/1993
Date Separated: October 1995

Current Status: Waiting for Court Decision.

The Story: I was in the Persian (Arabian) Gulf serving my seventh year in the United States Navy on the U.S.S..Abraham Lincoln (CVN 72) attached to Fighter Squadron 213 (The Fighting Blacklions). We had left for our six-month deployment in April. Aside from the usual hot hard work of carrier flight operations and having a collision with one of our supply ships the cruise was fairly uneventful until mid August. I received an emergency message to call home. When I called I was informed that Rebecca had fallen into the swimming pool during a party at my Home and that Lori (named changed) was having an affair with her supervisor from work. Lori had moved "Shane" (named changed) into my home with all of his belongings. As soon as I heard this my time limit on the phone was up and it disconnected. Up to this point in my life I had never felt such a feeling. My entire world was completely turn upside down and had almost no ability to contact anyone who could help me get it back together. Everything that I believed in, worked and lived for was gone. I didn't know what Rebecca's condition was.

Why my wife of 4 years had betrayed the complete and utter devotion and trust that I had given her. I went "nuts". I practically flew up the five stories to where my shop was on the ship slamming every door that I could. When I got there I told my supervisor that he had 24 hours to get me off this ship and headed home. (Like I had some kind of choice). It felt like the world underneath me had suddenly given out and I was falling into some kind of black hole that I couldn't get out of. *** Classified*** the next 6 weeks on the carrier ***Classified*** I felt as though everything in my life was gone in a flash. I can't explain how devastated I was. I can tell you that when I did get sleep it was unrest full and that I dreamed of Lori treating Rebecca as though she were some kind of possession that she didn't care about and wanted to get rid of.

To get the complete and current story, please go to their website at: http://www.icnet.net/users/thesaint/

Name: John & Domenic Murtari Location: Lyons, NY
Email Addr: jmurtari@thebook.com

Children/Birth Date: Domenic (Feb 11, 1993).
Date Separated: Oct 1, 1995

Current Status:   Denied relief in several  appeals on Issue of Jury Trial (including US Supreme Court), read details here. Most recent "bad news" was the relocation of Domenic to California.  Experienced a real child support disaster, including 6 months in jail.

The Story: Everything that's bad about the "system". Being a parent was everything I had dreamed of. I never would have believed I was considered so "expendable" in my son's life. Before the divorce started, we were both working part time, both equal parents -- but on the very first pretrial motion, I was expendable! Even though I stayed in the house, in a nice neighborhood, and my spouse moved into an apartment

My spouse could afford a lawyer -- I could not (and the Court gave me NO relief), and that made a BIG difference. The way divorces are usually done in New York State is the two lawyers and Judge negotiate it (without the parties present), and if there is an "issue" about the children, well a Law Guardian and maybe a Psychologist make all the necessary inputs. I wanted a jury -- and that was just "unheard of" and a "bad attitude". I was holding up a speedy settlement!

As I thought about this devastation, I just could not believe it.  I have been ever so thankful that Domenic and I have kept a strong relationship in spite of it all (see Christmas letter for more pictures).  I have struggled at a "child support" level which was set at over twice my actual income and local officials who simply refused to hear a "modification" after my son was relocated.  It costs me almost a $1000 to travel with my mother out west to see Domenic for a weekend -- none of that counts.

On appeal, I really had hoped for justice -- all I want is equal time with our child. I tried writing letters, with no effect.  I have always enjoyed history & philosophy and was struck by the lives of Martin Luther King and Gandhi.  The AKidsRight.Org group is an attempt to use the concept of NonViolent Action as a force for positive change. The keystones are Faith in a loving God, Love for others, and a willingness to make Personal Sacrifice.

 I will be calling attention to this by voluntary imprisonment.  (See our events page) You can also see some TV news in-jail interviews. This may sound strange, but I felt "free" after making the decision to "willingly" be imprisoned -- I am making a statement for what I believe in. I am now taking "action". I have no illusions about what "justice" is, and it did not happen here.

Name: Samuel Nieves Location: Perth Amboy, NJ
Email Addr: DonSamuel@Wordlnet.att.net

Children/Birth Date: Samuel (1986), Vivinia(1984)

Date Separated: August 1996 

Current Status: A violation of restraining order which has been pending since 4/24/1996. Also I have a Felony Warrant issued on May 24,1999 for child support arrears due to the fact that I lost my job while being out on family medical leave, due to mental and emotional stress caused by this ordeal.

It is my belief that the laws concerning child support, visitation, and custody must be changed to bring about fairness and equality. As they are written and enforced, these laws violate the civil and inalienable human rights of non-custodial parents as well as the rights of children to be guided by both of their mothers and fathers. Following is my own experience with these laws. I implore you to have your staff investigate my case and see for yourself that these laws are notworking.

This person has put together a nice website, check here for details.

Name: Jennifer von Busse Location: Cleveland, OH
Email Addr: brownsfan10@webtv.net

Children/Birth Date: Leah (1994), Mariah (1995)

Date Separated: March 1996  (Started web site, http://www.delphi.com/OhioParents)

 My husband met his first wife, Allie, (name  changed) while he was in the service.  She had  just graduated high school.  She had come to  live there with her father because her mother's  boyfriend was alcoholic and had abused her and  her sister for years.  Her mother found out,  but chose to stay with the boyfriend, so Allie  left.  She and my husband got engaged, and  within weeks found out they were pregnant.   The  arrangement was so chaotic, and work was so  scarce in their rural community, the young  couple made the decision to move to Ohio with  my husband's mother.     Living with his mother was not  much easier as she ran a full time daycare out  of her home, but it did give them the chance to  save enough money for their own place. 

Allie  refused to work during her pregnancy, claiming  that she had placenta previa and it would kill  her and the baby.  My husband inquired about  this in passing at a doctors appointment, and  was shocked to find out the doctor had no clue  what he was talking about.  This should have  been a clue for my husband.   Leah (name changed) came into the world in June  of 1994.  Her mother passed her a strep  infection (which was not mandatorily tested for  back then) and she was in ICU for the first  weeks of her life.    

After Leah came home, they decided they debated  on trying to get a bigger apartment in a safer  neighborhood.  When a bullet missed their  window by about 4 inches, they became  desperate.  At the same time, a friend of my  husband's from high school resurfaced.  His  parents had kicked him out and he was  temporarily staying with his sister.  Knowing  the predicament they were in, he proposed he  would move in with them until he could save up  for his own place, sleep on the couch, and pay  half the rent.  This way they could afford a  better place to live.  My husband talked it  over with his Allie, and she was surprisingly  agreeable to the idea and so it was. A few months later, Allie found out she was  pregnant again.  My husband was ecstatic but  also worried about how they would feed another  child.  Kyle, (name changed) his friend, had  fallen behind on paying his share of the rent.   Pete (my husband, name changed,) changed jobs  and started taking on overtime, often working  50 to 60 hours a week.  He started noticing odd  changes in Allie and Kyle.  When he came home  from a hard day at work, they would be laying  on the couch together watching movies, or he  would be rubbing her feet.  He voiced his  suspicions, and she vehemently denied anything  was going on.    

Pete's long hours finally caught up with him,  he developed menigitis, and was hospitalized.   Three days into his hospital stay, a nurse came  in and started asking him questions.  He was  confused, why did she need this information?   The nurse told him his wife had given birth the  day before, two floors down, to a baby girl.   He was excited, but furious that she hadn't  called him to tell him about it.  She hadn't  called anyone in his family.  Kyle was in the  delivery room with her.   It was four months later before the inevitable  happened.  He caught them in bed together.   Mariah was screaming in her crib from the next  room.   He ordered his friend to leave.  She  apologized and swore it would never happen  again.  The next day when he got home from  work, Kyle was back.  She told my husband she  was taking the kids to New York to visit her  mother, and when she got back she wanted him  gone.  Devastated and in shock, he did what she  asked. 

They filed for separation, she got  temporary custody, uncontested, and he got  visitation.  But he didn't get any visitation  from her.  His mother watched the kids at her  day care during the day, and if he was sick  from work he would see them, or if he really  sped driving home, he might get ten minutes.   He asked her about it, and she said that  technically, until the divorce was finalized,  she had every right to do this, that the  existing order was just a "suggestion." of how  to split time. I met my husband shortly before the divorce was  finalized.  I couldn't believe how hard he had  it with her.   I hated watching him call and ask  to see his kids, only to be told they were  having a "special day" with Kyle, his ex-friend  instead.  He would call to talk to them, and  Kyle would laugh in his ear and hang up on him.  

But he still really believed that after the  divorce was finalized things would change.   Well, they didn't.  We were supposed to have  the kids for Halloween, she wouldn't allow it.   Thanksgiving, they had to visit her mother out  of town, again no show.  Christmas we were  supposed to have them for three days.  We got  them for five hours while she was at work.  And  so it went.  When we got engaged, we had to  change the date of our wedding, because she  said if it was not on one of our weekends, she  would not allow them to come.  Miraculously,  they did come, but right after the honeymoon it  started again. Memorial Day, no kids. Father's  day, they had to spend with her boyfriend.   Yes, they had the chicken pox, but all we asked  was a phone call that never came.  And it  wasn't just the holidays either.

Sometimes we would find letters shoved in our mailbox that said she had taken the kids to New York for the weekend, or the week.  Sometimes we wouldn't even know until we found the house empty.  When she decided to go back to school, we reworked our  visitation schedule so we could watch them the  nights she was in school.  But she got mad at  him over something trivial, and put an end to  his midweek visitations entirely for the rest  of the month.   We thought about hiring an  attorney, but we didn't have the money, as I  was now pregnant with our son.  But we found  it, we had to, after Leah began bedwetting.   When she did wet the bed, she became terrified.  It turns out, one day when Kyle was watching  her she was playing outside and wet her pants.   She told him, and he said she would have to  stay in the wet pants as "punishment" for being  a bad girl. 

He then marched her into the back  yard, and told everyone what she had done,  pointing and gesturing to her wet pants, and  encouraged her younger sister and her uncle to  taunt her to humiliate her into "behaving."   Her uncle (the son of the man who abused Allie)  actually came up and grabbed her crotch, and  told her it "felt icky."  My husband called me  at work, frantic, asking me what to do.  I told  him we should first tell the mother, since she  was not home, to give her the benefit of the  doubt that maybe she did not know this was  going on.  So he talked to her that afternoon,  and she accused him first of making it up, then  when she questioned Leah and heard the same  story from her, accused him of planting it in  her head. That night when we went to pick them  up for visitation, they would not come out of  the house, instead the boyfriend came out, and  told us we could not see them, and there  whereabouts were "none of our concern." 

We  called the police, who ascertained that they  were in fact in the house and safe, but we  still did not get our visitation.  Then she  took them to a therapist because she was  "concerned about the influence of the father"   She refused to give us the name of the  therapist until a month into the sessions.  She  also told the therapist he was not allowed to  have any medical info, when it is expressly  provided for in his court order.  When we  finally met the therapist, she had had a month  of lies about how vile my husband was.  We told  her of the incident that happened, and the fact  that Kyle spanks the girls, and the visitation  problems.  She asked the mother who said it was  all a lie.  She never asked the child.  Not  once.  She determined that my stepdaughter was  under severe stress from the visitation  problems, and the ensuing arguments. She noted  that my husband was a good father, and the  girls had  good relationship with him.

So after some soul searching we filed for  custody, and contempt for the visitation.  It  took six months to get our hearing, and the  magistrate got them to agree to shared  parenting, because the psychologist report had  not shown clear signs of abuse.  The lawyers  didn't have time to draw up the papers before  she denied him his Christmas vacation.  His mom  was out of town, so he knew someone was  watching he kids, so he went over to get them  from the babysitter who turned out to be in  seventh grade.   The girls were wearing  mismatched shorts and T-shirts in the middle of  winter, had not been fed all day, and Leah had  a raging case of pink eye for which she had  recieved no medical treatment, and was  obviously in severe discomfort.  We called our  lawyer that night, and said forget it, we are  going for custody.   She was so mad over this,  she got her lawyer to suspend visitation with  us, claiming they had gotten the pink eye while  at our house, and that made it unfit.  Her  lawyer did not go through the family courts to  do this. She denied the next three weeks.  My  husband called and they would not pick up the  phone.  He left "I love you" messages for the  girls to let them know he wasn't absent by  choice.  She disconnected her answering  machine. 

Finally our lawyer called her lawyer  and threatened to have him disbarred, and then  she let us see them again.  We went to a judge  and got an ex parte hearing for a restraining  order, forbidding her from denying him  visitation. It didn't stop her.  Instead she  went to her lawyer and filed a motion to move  the girls out of state to her mothers.  The  same mother who had allowed her to be abused  for four years. She listed a  bogus address, and a bogus job.  She also got a restraining order on my husband claiming he had threatened to kill her, which was a lie.   We got a  Guardian Ad Litem appointed, and a court  psychologist.   Allie and Kyle had a huge fight several weeks  later in which he threw a chair at her.  He was so out of control, she fled to a friends' house  for the evening.  He trashed her house so bad  while she was gone, the landlord started  eviction proceedings. 

She told Leah and Mariah that if they told the Guardian Ad Litem, they  would never see her again. After months of  evaluations, the court appointed's determined  that yes, she had interfered with visitation,  yes Kyle was volatile, (although Allie had him  stay with his parents for three weeks so she  could convince them he had moved out, which she  did, he is now back.).  Both experts agreed  that they should not move to New York, that the  girls had a great relationship with my husband,  myself, and our son, that our home was great  for kids, and that they should recieve more  visitation with my husband, they recommended  she retain custody!   We were stunned.  We have  waited since July of 1998 for justice, and  protection for our family.  It looks to be a long time coming.  Meanwhile the girls are stuck in a nightmare they never asked for.  We are waiting for our final trial date at the end of the month.  As for our Christmas time this year, Allie says she might give it to us.  Depends on her plans...      

Name: Paula Nuzzi Location: Savannah, GA
Email Addr: sxynuzmom@aol.com

Children/Birth Date: Corrinne (1993)

Date Separated: January 19, 1998

    I have been fighting for primary custody back of my daughter since March 1996. My x-husband Mr. Heigert was military, and due to his circumstances needed 6 months a year with my daughter in order to keep housing. I wanted a safe place for my daughter to visit when she went to see her father so I agreed to sign a form granting him primary custody. I told him to sign that he would give me child support during the time I had my daughter so that it would show that the verbal agreement was that I would actually have my daughter during school months and his during summer. Mr. Heigert filed that paperwork in the state of California getting custody by way of uncontested divorce. At the time he was residing in Maryland and myself Georgia. So I immediately went to court in Maryland and recieved a temporary order of custody from the judge there and brought the case to Georgia. During that time my daughter had only been away from me for a few short weeks for visistation with her father.

In August of 1997 he got married and moved to Germany. In January of 1998 I got juristidiction in Chatham County Georgia and we went to court. The judge gave Mr. Heigert temporary custody of my daughter and allowed him to take her out of the country. During her time in Germany I was allowed 1 phone call a week for 10 min. I could only call between 6 and 7 p.m. his time. I followed Mr. Heigerts rule because I had no choice. In May he came back to the states and didn't allow me to speak to my daughter for 25 days. We went back to court for a final hearing June 18, 1998. The judge (Ms. Freesman) heard the case. I was never given the option of a jury trial. I was allowed summer visitation and in August 25, 1998 we finally received the order from Judge Freesman. She gave Primary custody to my x-husband. My daughter cried for 3 days and begged not to return to Germany. Because of my daughters "diffiance" in returning to Germany Mr. Heigert didn't allow her to return for 9 months.

He has broken every court order and again this Christmas he told me to purchase plane tickets for a visititation and then told me that I couldn't have her unless I signed an agreement with him giving up my week-end visistation. I didn't agree to the signing of the agreement even though I don't get my visisation now. He doesn't allow us to talk with her, he throws away gifts we send, he tells my daughter to call me Paula and her step-mother Mommy. We have now hired a psychologist for my daughter for the times she is with us because she complains of physical abuse by her step-mother. She is a very scared, depressed little girl and we can't get a judge in the US to listen to our case. I just keep running into brick walls. I just want my daughter to be safe, secure, and happy. I keep trudging forward because I know if I keep trying I will some how get this back to court and fight for my daughter.

The judicial system needs to change so that people don't have to go through attornies to have a court order followed. If a judge puts forth a court order the judge should see to it that it is followed.

Name: Robin Karr  Location: Corbin, KY
Email Addr: robinkarr@hotmail.com

Children/Birth Date: Matthew Duckworth 11/20/96 & Laura Duckworth 12/24/97

Date Separated: November 14, 1998 

Current Status: I have filed appeals with the 5th District Court of Appeals in Dallas Texas and also with the Kentucky Court of Appeals.

My story is very bizarre and if I were not living this nightmare, I'm not sure I would believe it. I was living in Kentucky with my three children (Christopher, Matthew, and Laura) whenever my second husband had me served with divorce papers. He was living in Rockwall Texas at the time. We were separated due to his abusing us. There are many persons who can verify the horrible abuse my children and I lived in with my ex-husband. Anyway, he filed for divorce in Rockwall Texas seeking custody of our two children together - then nine months and twenty-one months old.

There was a divorce action already pending in Kentucky which had been filed by my ex-husband when I was pregnant with our last child - Laura. It never occurred to me that he could initiate a new action in another state. However, he filed a voluntary dismissal of the Kentucky action which legally he could not do since I had filed an answer to his divorce petition. Somehow, he managed to pull the whole thing off through his attorneys. We had little money when we were together. In fact, I paid for the birth of Matthew and supported the family during my pregnancy with Matthew. (My ex-husband had trouble keeping a job.) I wondered where he was getting the money for attorneys. I had no job or money at the time I was served with the Texas divorce petition, so I tried to get legal aid. I could not obtain any legal help, so I wrote the judge in Texas a letter and requested a continuance on the hearing that had been set. (There was only a week to prepare for the hearing.) The judge in Texas used my letter as an appearance and had the hearing without me present. She ordered that my babies travel over 1,200 miles (each way) every weekend. They were ordered to live in Kentucky one week and Texas the next. I did not even have a car at this point because the judge had given our only vehicle to my ex-husband. She had granted my ex-husband a restraining order against me.

He got all of our furniture and personal belongings. Everything we owned belonged to me and my son Christopher. Yet, I got nothing - even to this day. I managed to borrow a van and went to Texas after my babies. The visitation continued as ordered for nearly eight weeks. My babies were very ill and bruised every time I picked them up from my ex-husband. I took them to the hospital nearly every time. On October 25, 1998, they were so badly injured that the hospital called the Kentucky State Police and Child Protective Services to the hospital. (I have these records.)  Laura had a black eye and Matthew had a skull fracture. I should never have let them go back to Texas, but I was afraid to go against a court order.  Looking back now, I should have held on to my babies and never let them go. I had no idea how corrupt the court system was at that time.  

When I went to Texas to pick them up for my week of court ordered visitation on November 19, 1998, I was served with a restraining order stating that I could not see my babies without supervision and that they could not be removed from Rockwall County Texas. Of course, I assumed that I could get legal remedy. I was wrong. I borrowed $5,000.00  for an attorney who turned out to be a party of taking my babies from me. (I have evidence and documentation to support this.)  I even have him admitting this on audio tape. He spent the entire $5,000.00 in an eight week period.   After he had spent all of the money I had paid him and after I learned that he was working against me, I let him withdraw.

I had to borrow another $5,000.00 in order to hire yet another attorney. He spent the entire amount in less than two months as well. He wrote me less than a week before a hearing in March 1999 and told me that unless I sent him another $5,000.00 in two days, he would not represent me at my hearing. (I have a copy of this letter.) The judge allowed him to withdraw at my hearing and she forced me to represent myself - even though she stated that she believed I was too mentally ill to parent my own babies. (I have the transcript of this hearing.) She awarded my ex-husband sole custody of our babies and ordered me to pay him child support and health insurance. I was served with a motion for sanctions at this hearing as well. (I had filed an application for a protective order against my father-in-law for abusing Matthew.) My father-in-law had abused Matthew while we were temporarily living with them. Even CPS admitted that , based on police reports, etc., they believed my father-in-law abused Matthew. I have this admission on audio tape and also in a letter to a Kentucky State Representative. I was never allowed to enter this into the record though. In fact, I was never allowed to have one witness testify on my behalf - ever.

I borrowed over $3,000.00 in February 1999 in order to fly my witnesses to Texas for a hearing. None of them were allowed to testify. Only my ex-husband's witnesses were allowed to testify.  All of his witnesses were court-appointed by the judge with the exception of his mother. I was ordered to pay a supervisor cash in order to see my babies. This is what they do in the Dallas area. I later learned that the judge owns the supervising business. I began writing letters to Governor Bush and others about all of the illegal and unconstitutional things going on in my case and in that county. The judge ordered a mental exam on me. My attorney told me that if I did not take the exam, I would not ever see my babies again. I took the exam since there is nothing wrong with me. The report stated that I was border-line retarded (even though I graduated from college with honors.) It stated that I had an overt thought disorder even though I have a major in English. The report stated that I was not capable of parenting children.

My final hearing lasted for eleven hours and yet, I was never allowed to have one witness testify. I was sanctioned by the court for filing the application for a protective order - even though it was never heard or signed by the judge. I was sanctioned in the amount of $10,000.00 and was ordered to write a letter of apology to my ex-in-laws. I was then ordered to see a psychiatrist and begin taking medication. The judge further ordered that any new psychiatric reports were to be sealed.  In other words, any reports that would state that I'm okay were to be sealed. I was given only supervised visitation which I would have to pay for. I was ordered to pay child support and health insurance. I was permanently enjoined from ever filing any complaint against my ex-husband or any member in his family or any child abuse complaints.

My divorce decree is the most bizarre document you will ever see. My court transcripts are bizarre as well. I tried to get the Kentucky court to take jurisdiction since Kentucky is the home state of both of my babies. Yet, for some unknown reason, the judge here made a deal with the judge in Texas to let Texas have my babies. I have a copy of a letter from the judge in Kentucky to the judge in Texas stating this. I have filed an appeal in Kentucky. I have also filed an appeal in Texas. Channel 8 in Dallas did a story on me on February 15, 2000 entitled "Mom Labled Dangerous Battles for Custody of Kids." This can be located at www.wfaa.com. A Dallas attorney who saw my story agreed to file my appeal in Texas. I have heard nothing from either appeal as yet. I have tried to visit my children and I have been warned by the judge that I will be arrested if I step foot in Texas. My ex-husband has told me that I will not be allowed to see my babies for another fifteen years. He has said that he will hide them if he has to in order to keep them away from me. I have these conversations on audio tape. I have 40 pounds of documentation and evidence, and yet, the court has managed to keep all of it out of the record. 

This is just a portion of my story, but I believe that anyone who reads this can realize that something is desperately wrong with the family courts in America whenever a mother can lose all rights to her children. I have lived through the most barbaric experience.  In an instant, my world and my children's world was shattered. We would never be free to love or cuddle again. It is outrageous that a "family" law court in America can rule on divorce and custody and all the while neglect to protect a mother's right to love and parent her children. Justice surely betrayed my children. Justice has deprived my children of their birthright -their own mother. I tell my story for two reasons. I want others who have had their children unjustly taken to know that they are not alone and that there are others who know the gutwrenching pain they live with every day. I also want my children to know that I love them more than anything and that I did not abandon them. I want them to know that we were caught up in a justice system incapable of delivering justice. And most of all, I want them to know that I did not remain silent.  If anyone wants to contact me, please e-mail me at robinkarr@hotmail.com.

Update 12/6/2000 - I wanted to send an addition to my existing story. There are several important facts I forgot to mention in my original submission. I neglected to mention that I was arrested at my February 1999 hearing for crying when I was denied even a supervised visit with my children. (The court-appointed supervisor had refused to do the supervisions over and over again.)  I was arrested in front of my son Christopher, who still has nightmares about it.

A local newspaper editor who was present at my hearing wrote a front page story about my arrest for crying. He was later threatened and his newspaper was shut down. He and his family were literally run out of Rockwall. Before leaving town, he warned me that CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates) had told him that I would be arrested for selling drugs if I did not stop trying to see my children. CASA was brought to Rockwall by the judge and the court-appointed supervisor was a CASA volunteer. (Although a volunteer, the supervisor charged me to see my children. Payment was due in cash only.) I have never abused or sold any kind of drugs. In fact, I have never even smoked a cigarette. I have always lived a clean, christian life to the best of my ability. This was, however, used against me in court. The judge first issued the restraining order against me because of my christian beliefs.

I was interrogated for hours in court for having dedicated my children to God when they were born and for praying over them. The mental exam was ordered because of my christian beliefs. The mental exam even stated that I ADMITTED having gone to non-denominational churches in my past. My divorce decree states that I'm not allowed to talk about the devil with my children. That is a very bizarre part of my divorce decree.

My court transcripts and documents are like nothing anyone has ever seen. I have not been allowed to see my children since June 1999. I was only allowed 21 hours of supervised visitation before that. I was in labor longer than that with either of them. When I did see my children, I had to see them at the police station - as if I were some sort of criminal. There are no words to explain what that did to me. Matthew was just learning to talk good. He turned to me at that vistit (he was 28 months old) with tears in his eyes and said "I miss you Mommy." I hear him in my sleep sometimes saying that. They had to pry him off of me to take him away at the end of the visit. Laura had a serious head injury at that visit which took place on March 18, 1999. Imagine having to leave her with the people who had caused the injury. My ex-husband just laughed.

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